Tuesday, January 14, 2014

January 14 (Tuesday)

January 14 (Tuesday) - Day two of being sick as a dog.  I did manage to run but it was a horrorshow.  My body was definitely fighting something from head to toe yesterday worse than I've felt in a long long time.  Today, when I woke up, I felt better but still awful.  Work went better and I wasn't feeling the shakes and sweats and cramping I had yesterday, but I still had stomach issues and a headache and my glands in my neck were swollen and sore.  It reared it's ugly head when I went to the mill.  I got in there about 6:00pm and there was a girl doing an incline workout on the good treadmill.  It was the first time I've ever actually seen someone legitimately using that good treadmill (besides me).  I didn't hesitate to get on the bad t-mill next to her.  She only went another few minutes and got off.  I could have hopped over to the good mill when she got off, but I was about 8 or 9 minutes into my run so I figured I'd just stay on it.  About 5 minutes later, the 'walkers' came in.  They were probably shocked that I wasn't on the good treadmill hogging it... The usual girl got on the good mill and did her walk while I just continued on my way.  About 25 minutes in I started to get intense waves of digestive distress.  I didn't want to get off the mill halfway (or not even half way) through but it was one of those horrendous 'sick' feelings that you really need to take a crazy dump and it ain't gonna be pretty.  If I was in the woods or on the roads, I'd have pulled off and into some bushes far sooner... but I was stubborn and continued on.  The waves of distress came over my bowels repeatedly.  They would come, last for a minute, then go away for a minute and then come back again.  Dan Vassallo once told me on a run one night in Andover, that you can only 'hold it in' like that I believe 7 times in a row and then it starts to do permanent damage.  So I had that on my mind too.  I went probably 20 minutes like this...sweating profusely and making all sorts of awful faces...I could feel myself tensing up (especially my butt cheeks) and getting really stressed out.  Finally I hit the pause button and ran the hell out of there...embarrassed because the other 4 people in there (all ladies) all obviously knew what was wrong.  I ran down the hall and to the locker room where there is just one stall and it is immediately by the door and directly across from the sink and mirror.  It is intimate in there to say the least.  Obviously as soon as I opened the door, the g*ddamn place was packed with people.  Young kids, etc.  I wanted to cry.  The only thing that could have made it worse was if the stall was occupied.  It wasn't though and I threw open the door, whipped my soaked shorts down, and proceeded to clear the place out.  It was horrendous but it was also sweet relief.  I held my head up high as I walked out and ran back to the mill.  It was all I could do.  I got back up on it like nothing happened, and I just hoped any prayed that the scent of the murder scene in the bathroom didn't follow me back into the gym.   I hit the pause button again and restarted the workout.  I got 5 minutes in and it friggin' started all over again.  I let it go again for maybe another 20 minutes.  This time it came back worse.  The walkers were milling around by this time and stretching and picking up things and putting them down, etc.  Right after they finished and walked out, I gave it like 1 minute until I figured they were in the locker room and I hit pause again and shot back down the hallway.  Right before I got to the men's locker room, the women's door opened and they started to walk out and I almost bowled over one of them.  I quickly apologized as I shot around her and hit the head again for round 'two' (no pun intended).  This time, on the way back to the t-mill, I knew it was going to keep happening so I figured I'd get to 9 miles and call it.  I was planning on doing 10 and was clipping 6:40s as a set pace.  When it hit 9, I got off for good and ran again down to the bathroom and this time barely made it.  9 miles in 60:40.  Good enough for being sick.  One more time as I sat there in the bathroom, and it started again to fill up with people coming in from the pool, I proceeded to have no shame.  I quickly got dressed and headed home.  But even before I hit the start of East Madison Rd., I had to go again.  I raced up and over the mountain and back down to my house, literally pinching my ass closed as I drove.  I kicked open the side door of my house, threw my bag down, and flew up the stairs and into the back bathroom.  I have a feeling I'll be in there for a while over the next day or so.  I'm blogging this right now from the throne.  Running definitely makes it worse. As I sit here now, it's bad but not as bad as if I start moving around.  I dread trying to run tomorrow. I may have to try to do something outside so it's not as stressful.  Hopefully in a day or 2 I'll be over this.  I hope it's just something I possibly ingested and not a stomach bug/flu of some kind.  Time will tell.


  1. This might be the best blog post I have read all year. 2013 too.

  2. ha! thanks :). It was the least I could poo...I mean do.

  3. Only halfway through January and we've already got the Blog Post of the Year! Well done!